The Material Girl in Christmas

I was in Ilo-Ilo City for three days last week for a journalism competiton. I had lots of much-anticipated free time so I thought, "Why not do my christmas shopping here?". I was expecting that stuff in Ilo-Ilo are cheaper in price compared to those in my hometown Bacolod. But I was frustratedly wrong. Ilo-Ilo City is more modernized and "economically" better than Bacolod. So prices there are higher, more expensive. [Okay, enough of that. I'm not here to talk about prices and compare cities. Sometimes, or actually most of the time, I get carried away from the topic. :) ]

With a reasonable budget in hand and a good pair of newly-bought sneakers, I set out to hunt for my victims. My companions apparently made a way to ditch me so I had the pleasure of shopping all by myself. It felt.. cool [wow! what an intellegent choice of an adjective]. I was alone in this big unfamiliar shopping mall in a big unacquainted city. I felt independent and a big girl. Hey, i don't need mummy anymore to get my way around.


[I am straining from the topic again] So anyway, I had a hard time shopping. I saw good buys and great deals and I had the money to buy them, but the problem was, my selfishness kept on going in the way, tempting me to shop and buy all for myself. I already had a spend-plan for my budget but the material girl inside of me kept on telling me to splurge on a single thing for no one else but myself.. and myself alone. And silly me, I gave in. I let my insane side win over my sane being.



At the end of the day, I had an irrationally expensive clutch bag, and a handful of remorse.

Similar to that incident is what is happening during the Christmas season. Admit or not, we all become materialistic during the Holidays. All year long, each of us has longed, desired, craved, yearned, whatever you call it, for material things we sadly could not have with a snap of a finger. All year long, we have eyed those pricey and dreamy things, hoping to someday call them "mine". And now that the "gift-giving" season has come, we all have high hopes that we will finally lay our hands on the things on our wish lists.

During noche buena, we become monsters, ripping apart those beautifully wrapped gifts, revealing the objects of our desires and affection. Then we are glad for our material cravings have been satisfied.

Does this scene seem plausible? .. and familiar? Come clean now, fellow. We have all become victims of our material sides.

I'm not anti-gifts, people. In fact, I do love gifts. My heart palpitates whenever I receive one. But what I'm trying to tell you guys is that we become too preoccupied and engrossed to physical things when Christmas season comes. The real reason for this celebration is overshadowed by our materialism. Christmas has become a commercialized season. Sad reality, right?

During Noche Buena, why don't we pause for a while in the middle of the madness and festivity and think back to the real intention behind the season. Let us not forget that above all the Christmas ornaments, all the presents, all the holiday hams.. is the birthday of our Redeemer. Let's greet Him with a thankful heart for all the blessings we unawarely and undeservingly receive from Him is far more worth than a million iPhones or Ferraris in this planet.

Now, that is what CHRISTmas is all about.

Blessed Christmas. [hug]

It about time to GROW UP!

[Whoah! Wordy thoughts ahead! I am not this serious in real life. In fact, I'm kinda quirky and unpredictable like Dee Dee. I seldom get super serious with things.But here, boohoo..I have to be serious. The occasion calls for it. :) ]
After more than a week of schooldays without Nadine, I say I am okay. I am not that depressed or sad anymore. Although I still feel unhappy whenever I see her empty armchair, I am okay. I guess the feeling of missing her will never go away. It will remain in my system and as time goes on.. I will eventually get used to it. We see each other and talk on the phone once in a while. Things are simply changing. And we all know that we can't fight change. It's one of the strongest forces of nature. I am embracing change now. Change happens for a reason.



Today, I want to get a little more personal and share how I really feel towards the recent happenings in my life. Whenever I blog, Its always just about the "first level" of what and how I really feel. Of course, I have to set some boundaries of privacy. After all, anyone can read my blog. But at this moment, I am going beyond that boundary. I want, for the first time, to be completely honest [or almost]. I don't know why. I just want to.

I started this post with a positive outlook towards this change. Yes, I am quite seeing things in a different perspective now.

You see, I've been living in the shadow of my friend Nadine. I was at first oblivious to it, but now the picture is clear. I am always just walking and standing behind her back, following her direction. I am fickle-minded person and I've grown to depend on her decisions. Whatever she decides on is also my decision. Whatever she chooses is also my choice.Whatever way she walks on is also my path. Do you now see the picture? I don't have my own individual identity because I've come to press and push myself with Nadine's. It's like "Nadine can stand with her own self, but Charisse? Naah. She needs Nadine."

So there you go.

One particular instance of living in her shadow is I being the Vice-President and Nadine being the President of our student government. She does all the action while I am just there, ready to do whatever is left. Come to think of it, it is my fault why I have become so dependent of her. I have my own hands, my own feet, my own mind yet I chose to follow and go along with hers. Nadine has nothing to do with this. She maybe even unaware that I was feeling this way all along.

So lads and gents, when Nadine transferred, I was left in awe. It is as if my backbone left my body...No more to support myself. I was greatly affected because now, I am faced with the burden of making my own decisions and simply, doing things all by myself. The worst part is, I'll have to occupy her vacated position as President!

Then and there, I realized that I've been breathing and existing in the shadow of my best friend. This change took the shadow away. My shade has gone and now, I am exposed to the brightness of responsibility and independence. I have been thinking a lot about this and I am sure it will be hard for me. I'm so used to the darkness of the shadow that this new brightness may somewhat blind me.

Nadine moving to another school has given me unfamiliar personal challenges. It will test not only our friendship, but of course, myself as an individual. I will take one step at a time as I create and find my own identity. My stepping stone will be functioning as an effective and reliable President. New power comes new responsibilities...

But with a deep sigh, I shall grow and learn to stand in my own feet!

"There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot..."

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2